Pheelin lost...

greggy, originally uploaded by PrincessEmily210.

I've had this nagging feeling all week- this constant lack of feeling, a confusion and a cloudiness of where i am headed next- where do i place my foot down after this step? and i dont know... I dont know where I have managed to go wrong, or what in my life is good for me and what is bad- what do i need to maintain my sense of self and what do i need to drop for my own health. lots of serious thought about possible problems and footholes where i got caught and never managed to notice. it seems kind of like a few months ago, or maybe it was july- i made a couple of decisions that totally threw my life off course and im just now noticing that i've turned out to be a completely different person than i was this time six months ago.
i'm doubting too much- not trusting in my love, my passion, my life, my voice, my decisions. is this school right? right job? right love? right ambition? right state? right friends? (are there even any left who i dont have to drive forever to see?)
i need to find my center again, find my purpose. i need to fix my relationship- talk to him more- try to figure out what is going wrong that we just cant relate anymore, and why we havent spent the night together in a week. i need to make more art, and eat less. i need to write more, study more, abuse less. i need to talk to an old friend, sort things out. i need to find my roots and my path.